The False Narrative of Control: The Real Problem in Christian Communities

 After my article about Control Freaks messing the world up, and as I went about the seminar using the book Good and Beautiful God by James Bryan Smith, I had a vital epiphany. On page 45, Smith mentions that the desire for control is one of the causes of people doing bad things. Indeed, having such a desire would mean fear of loss of control; this leads people to become fearful and desperate, and as a result, they resort to forceful, coercive and rights-violating (and indeed, sinful) measures to address this.

Another Perspective on the “First Murder”

The Biblical account of Cain and Abel, considered the first murder, has often been thought of as a case of jealousy. Cain is thought to have been jealous of God’s reaction to Abel’s offering. Indeed, God’s reaction is longer to Abel than to Cain. Cain saw it as favoritism, though it isn’t. So the usual lesson taught is that God does not play favorites, despite us believing differently. But there could be another angle to it, that still sticks with the message of the Word.

Control-Freaks Are the Ones who Ruin the World

Have you, believing you are in the right, wanted to enforce your view of this on another person? If you find someone who disagrees, you are so angry with them that you will start to hate them, want them removed from your sight or life? And, when you reach the breaking point, want them killed? That’s probably the way a control-freak feels.

Have you balked at someone else’s choice of music, food, books or clothes? Has someone’s taste (or lack of) shocked you? Have you wanted to step into lives and tell them what music to listen to, what food to eat, what books to read or clothes to wear? Did you want to do this because you didn’t want to be “offended” by their taste?

If you dislike a colleague’s working style, have you snapped and said to them, “your way sucks! This is how you do it!” And you do it arrogantly. Some people say the same thing when they see a friend’s lifestyle they don’t like. They feel like they have the right to order the friend around and make their lives “better.” They have always dreamed of seizing control of someone and direct them, and perhaps when the friend does benefit from this control, the friend will thank them and they can be so proud of themselves and boast it to the world. They probably want to be like the hosts of “Queer Eye for the Straight Guy,” only they want to do it by force.

You’ve probably heard someone say, “I know you better than you know yourself. So do as I tell you!” or “I’m disgusted that you think that way. You’re a disgusting person because you don’t react the way I want you to!” Or, “How dare you act like that towards me! When you talk to me, you do it the way I want you to! Give me the manner and respect I want!” So they will want to dictate you and try to run your life for you.

Other examples:

“Why aren’t you outraged at the same thing I'm outraged at? You’re on the side of evil aren’t you? That’s it! I won’t accept any explanation from you! Either you’re with me or against me! Fuck you! I’ll bring you down!”

“I believe everybody should be nice… so I will force them to be nice!”

If you’re like the above, then you are among the people who are making the world hell.

Filipino Imperialism: Emocratic Nonsense

(This is an older article from 2010 in Antipinoy.com that later disappeared after the site was revamped. I reprint it here.)

Lately I happened upon a page with the title Imperalismo ng Pilipinas.  The idea struck me as funny. The Philippine Empire? Now many might ask what’s wrong with that? I would ask, I thought Filipinos hated imperialism? You have American, Spanish and corporate imperialism, but then you want Filipino Imperialism? That would constitute a great deal of hypocrisy.  

There are other ways Filipino Imperialism rears its ugly head. 

Is blogging only for Money?

Perhaps this is nothing to get worried over, but I do hear other people assuming that blogging is for money. I’ve been accused by shills that I get paid for my blogging, especially on Get Real Philippines. As I said before, my blogging for this and other sites is done for free, unless I reveal it. So far, I have nothing to reveal except Nuffnang, just an attempt to see if I can make money at from it. But it’s only gotten less than P150 since I put the feature on. I can’t get a decent living from that.